RBI Monthly Plan ….Episode 3

(very sorry bout the delay..I know its been more than a month but I had places to go and ppl to meet so...anyway here goes)


Well I don’t really have much time so am gonna keep this as succinct as possible…in fact I think I’ll use bullets
Petu, Roy and I hit the colony at bout 6…played a few tunes on Sushil’s new guitar…admonished him about his results…had Hershey’s strawberry syrup…. tried to talk Sahil into coming ( he had his final exams going on) and almost succeeded but the last ounce of sensibility left in him held him back…..Sushil wanted to come too but sighting unpleasant consequences he was urged to skip this one
Saand returned from his project viva (obviously he’d done well…who doesn’t?) and all of us drove down to Totos.
Hasnainji joined us shortly and then ‘start’…a pitcher of beer for all of us …a large whisky on the rocks for Saandji and our favourite side dish…. French Fries!!!
A few drinks later miss Namrata walked in with a friend but much to Saandji’s and more Hasnainji’s dissapointment she was not gonna be joining us.
The pitchers kept coming in…and even more French fries….I think we were gonna be setting a new record with the French fries….
Between his consecutive ‘large whiskies on the rocks’, Saandji went down a couple of times and asked Namrata and her friend to join us…. these guys were standing in an overcrowded completely smoked out bar but for some Godforsaken reason refused to join us on our table even though there was enuf place to accommodate them.
Neway as is mandatory with every RMP there had to be a couple at our table making out like crazy…..this time twas the Stones (Roy and Petu) ….these guys were making out even before one of them left for the loo….
Neway finally Ms.Namrata and her friend ( I am really sorry but I cant recall your name….but will find out soon and edit the Blog J ) decided to join us at our table….I find it nonplussing really…why couldn’t they jus join us from the time they walked in….whatever happened to whatever was holding them back….mebbe her friend was analyzing us from afar …figuring out if we were cool enuf to be graced by her august company!!!…wot can I say…I am glad we qualified…
Well after some plainly empty pointless and some nonsensical conversation ( I remember talking to someone about dogs and Saand sayin that Namrata’s dog humps everything in her house) later I went out with namrata cos she waned to buy cigarettes…I actually thought I was going out cos I had to drive her friend home…neway we stuck aroud outside for a while to get some fresh air….in about 5 min Saandji came out to check on us (talk about being paranoid)…I wonder where he thought we might have taken off too….
Well we went back inside and I found out later that whilst we were outside Hasnainji had been at his Nangiri again; apparently a nice looking lady had asked if she rest her behind on one of our empty stools and after havin made some pleasant convo with her told her Saand (not he) thought she was cute…..well she was gone before Saandji had put down his glass and looked up to see what was going on.
Well a while later Petu and I (much against Saandji’s protestations) drove Namrata’s friend home …. A lil more empty talk ensued during the drive finally we dropped her off….and returned….clearly Petu was a lil disgruntled with the girl because either she forgot to say goodnight or to thank us….women I say!!!
well we hung around at Totos for a while longer ...Saandji mostly wore a despondent look through most of this time though cause Namrata was now socialising with a few of Anish'd juniors at the bar and we kept harrowing Saandji tht he cud do nothing bout his Juniors...
Finally we left Totos .Namrata parted ways although Hasnainji insisited she hang around longer...the rest of us drove down to carters where the couple(roy et petu) went for a walk...a rather long one at tht cause cops kept on harrowing us to leave and we cudnt w/o those two.Finally they were back and we left..Sanndji drove home sayin exams were approaching and some studying had to be done.
Well the last four of the Mohicans (Roy,Petu,Hasnain and myself) now left for another party at a t Goregaon. One of hasnainji's friend's parent's were away and she had called her college friends over.When we got there most of the junta there had worn out however there was a tabe ful of good food and wine( there really was a bottle of Red Wine) awaiting us. well all the Chicken was eaten...all the wine was sipped...a lil of it with Caramel Pudding :) and our job here was done....Hasnain was gonna crash right there for the rest f the night so the rest of us said our goodbyes and moved on.
Soon aftre we dropped Petu home Roy and I were soon gonna have our second midnight adventure (now dont go getting all zany ideas )...as we started to drive hope me and Roy came to a juncture where I gought we shud be goin left and Roy thought right...since the place was close to Petu's place Roy was given the benifit of doubt and we drove on.Twas about 4 in the morn and the streets were asdeserted as they cud be...as we drove on I realised I was seein a part of Mumbai I had never seen before...now this would have been merely quixotic for any other person ...but Roy and I had a history..las new Years while trying to Drop roy home whoe wtays a 10 min drive from my Gorai home we had gone about in circles for nearly 2 hrs and even after dropping Roy off I'd had been lost for about an hour.....so obviously the two of us were not the best navigators around....wel as we kept driving Roy kept dropping names to assert that he was very much in control of the situation and knew exactle wher we wer...Yari road he said....millat Nagar...Versova....now I knew all this places were in and around Andheri but none of them smelt like fish...by the beard of the prophet !! we were in some kind of fishermen's settlement ...neway I decided to hold back my anxiety for a bit but as we kept driving the road ahead kept getting narrower till we reached a point where the road was so narrow there was no way a Zen could fit in it.....and even worse was the fact tht there wasnt enough room to reverse and make a U turn.. finally Roy decided to gte out and do something...he saw some benches lying by the pavement and decided tht by moving them and using the pavement the car could jus bout fit.....and to date we wonder how but I managed to make the turn after reversing bout 31 times ofcourse but nontheless...as we drove back we saw fisherwomen leaving in tempos for the fish market......finally we stopped for directions and hit link rd....this time luckcily we dint have trouble finding Roy's place (or else we'l have reached home at 9 for breakfast)...I finally dropped Roy off and drove home myself reflecting on the madness tht revolves around my very existence...
Neway guess this'llbe my las RMP blog for a while cos once I am off to Delhi nad really doub tif'll have the time or the patience to type out another one of these.....Also watchout for the next RMP....we are calling it the RMP Mega Bash and this time it realy might happen at Gorai with lotsa ppl and gallons of rubbing alcohol running trough the strip and once again I really dint mean to strike anyone below the belt...In case I have please lemme know and the text shall be edited appropriately....
-abu
Tongue Tied And Twisted Just An Earth-bound Misfit I ....

RBI Monthly Plan –Round Two – 9th April ‘05

Late Friday night I was informed by one of the senior admins (Anish) that venue has been shifted from Gokul to Toto’s. I’d be lying if I said I wasn’t relieved for Gokul besides being far away is also a much less happening place especially cos theres no music whatsoever.

Well the time decided was 7pm sharp…..as expected Saand was waiting outside Totos at 7pm sharp. Myself and Royston, although we were in Bandra expecting everyone to arrive late decided to stuff ourselves at Lucky…Schezwan Rolls, Chocolate Mousse et all. When we finally got to Totos at 7.20 there was no one ther cause Sannd had gone to pick up Charmaine and James from the stations. We got inside and booked ourselves a table for 8. Well so much for being puctual,it was nearly 8.15 and still no one. After having shot a thousand sheepish looks at us one of the waiters finally came up to our table and chastised us for taking up space on a Saturday night. We finally decided to place an order for a pitcher of beer – later we realised it was for the best after all because Hasnainji was not here yet and God knows if we’d have got any at all once he’d arrived.

Well just as the beer arrived so did Saand and the ladies. Our guests tonight were Charmaine – one of Sahil’s classmates and Namrata – Saand’s college junior who by the way is only his ‘good friend’ and kudos to her for successfully maintaining status quo on that all through the evening inspite of some people (Hasnainji) trying to coerce her to atleast hint otherwise.Anyway the next person to arrive was Hasnainji soon followed by James.Sahil was gonna be late because he had a placement interview in Malad.The party was in full swing by 8.30 with the guys’ glassses full of draught beer, Saand having his third large peg of whisky and the girls with their vodkas.

9.00 pm and everyone was pleasantly buzzing in the head with Saand a lil higher than the rest. No one knew where Sahil was.Now was the time for the PJs. Here’s one that Saand asked Namrata

Saand:Knock Knock

Nam:Who’s There?

Saand:Your Father

Nam:My Father?????

Saand:You dunno your father…..Bastard Guy!!!!!!!!!!

Everyone starts cachinating and Saand says : Aloud hai ! Aloud hai !

Heres another one Saand came up with when the girls asked him to buy em a round of Tequilas:I’ll buy you’ll Black Forest……..it’s Black and theres a forest down there !!!!!!!!!!!!!! Aloud hai! Aloud hai!

This one actually went on to become the theme of the night….

10.00 pm Saand is now 5 pegs down and no one knows where the hell Sahil is; the rest of us are still swigging at our beers…I think it was our third pitcher….Charmaine sugests a new game for everyone…”Never ever have I….”

Heres some of the brilliant things that people came up with….

1.never ever have I showered with a girl

2. never ever have I shown my thing to anyone except my girlfried…poor saand couldn’t drink to ths one J )

3. never ever have I had an affair with Zohra (once again bad news for Mr. Anish)

4. never ever have I kissed a guy (what can I say….sannd had kissed 3 guys jus last week)

5. never ever have I have I not known what to say (how lame… this was me :@ )

6. never ever have I gone around with a girl who has smooth skin….

7. never ever have I done acid…wtf!!!

There were many more but these are all I can remember

Somewhere in the middle of the games an offer of a Shot of Tequila each was placed before the women if they agreed to french kiss ……sadly no consensus was reached on the issue….

11.00 pm. Saand is now 6 pegs down and still theres absolutely no trace of Sahil….it’s the fourth pitcher for the guys though

Random discussion brings us back to the topic of when Hasnainji saw (and measured) Saand’s ummm…. “Thing”…… after much deliberation it is conclusively proved that it hovers around 2 to 2.5 inches J…..in the middle of Saands furious protests Sahil cals up from nowhere sayin tht hes got a job … theres cheer around the table mostly because everyone now expects sahil to foot a major chunk of the bill J ……in the middle of all this Saand orders his 7^th drink after having a pleasant chat with the waiter……surely after about a couple of sips he starts feeling queasy and decides to step out for a whiff of fresh air…..on Hasnainji’s direction I followed Sand out to chk on him…sure enough he was puking and could use a hand ( I wonder what we would ever do without the sagacious Mr.Hasnainji J )…in the middle of all this I got a call on my cell phone from Petruchka (Mrs.Roystoned for the lesser informed souls) and somehow Hasnainji got his hands on the phone and did everything in his power to convince her that Roy was out partying with some other chick – he put both Charmaine and Namrata on the fone to convince her.Sadly he had no idea how strong the the bonds of love were between the two Stones (maybe hes not so sagacious afterall J ).

12.00 Saand has stopped drinking finally but theres no stopping the rest of the gang …..Sahilji finally arrives and many hugs and congratulations later finally says he’s in a position to sponsor a pithcher but he wont be drinking himself….hah…no one told him the joke session was already done with……but wait hes serious this time around…apparently hes made a promise to Mrs.Sahilji (a particular Miss Sharon …I don’t know much about her so I’ll refrain from commenting…mebbe after the next monthly plan J )…….Someone decides to restart the game and now most of the themes involve Namrata and Saand and are aimed at making sure they are a couple before they leave…but sadly both of them hold their ground and maintain tht they are only good friends ….yeah alright !!!!!!!!

neway its time for the girls to go….Saand leaves with James to drop them in the meanwhile Sahil tells us all about his intervew and new job…..mus say he did quite a commendable job….but whats with the ‘not drinking’ pact…….I am sorry Sahilji but this is a definite symptom of CDism……..

1.00 am Its jus the guys now and except James everyone has lived in RBI for a really long time so obviously the conversation drifts towards the going-ons in the colony.Finally at about 1.30 we decide to call it a day and Roy and head home while the rest of the gang is headed towards Saand’s friends place where a quarter of Whisky and one of Rum await them……I was later told though tht it was mostly a dull affair ……one that Hasnaniji slept through and Mr.james puked through….

So that was it……please forgive the tongue in cheek tone that prevails all through this account…also if any of the stuff on this spot needs to be edited for obvious reasons please lemme know……also if I have managed to offend someone….hell its 4.30 in the morn I am entitled to have a lil fun …..ALOUD HAI!!!

-abu

Ps.Next monthlyplan is on Hasnainji …its his Birthday on the 11^th of May J J

big plans....

as the audience of ths blog awaits a report for last months monthly plan party big plans are being drawn up by Sahil Saand and myself for the next one to be held on the 9th of April....amongst the proposed grandoises is a beach party on Gorai beach or Aksa beach.....I have a strong feeling though tht we are gonna end up in Yacht :).....we'll see

-Abu